Tuesday, January 15, 2019
Today's Gift
We learn some behaviors have self-defeating consequences, while others have beneficial consequences. We learn we have choices. —Beyond Codependency
It is so easy to come to the defense of others. How clear it is when others are being used, controlled, manipulated, or abused. It is so easy to fight their battles, become righteously indignant, rally to their aid, and spur them on to victory.
"You have rights," we tell them. "And those rights are being violated. Stand up for yourself, without guilt."
Why is it so hard, then, for us to rally to our own behalf? Why can't we see when we are being used, victimized, lied to, manipulated, or otherwise violated? Why is it so difficult for us to stand up for ourselves?
There are times in life when we can walk a gentle, loving path. There are times, however, when we need to stand up for ourselves - when walking the gentle, loving path puts us deeper into the hands of those who could mistreat us.
Some days, the lesson we're to be learning and practicing is one of setting boundaries. Some days, the lesson we're learning is that of fighting for our own rights and ourselves.
Sometimes, the lesson won't stop until we do.
Today, I will rally to my own cause. I will remember that it is okay to stand up for myself when that action is appropriate. Help me, Higher Power, to let go of my need to be victimized. Help me appropriately, and with confidence, stand up for myself.
From The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie ©
From: Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation - Thought for the Day http://www.hazeldenbettyford.org/recovery/thought-for-the-day
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Twenty-Four Hours a Day
Keep It Simple
Some of us were treated badly as young kids and never learned how to live for ourselves. We can see only two choices: either be submissive and caretaking or be abusive and demanding. Many of us have so much guilt and shame that we feel we don't deserve to stand up for ourselves. This program demands that in recovery we be for ourselves. If we don't know how, we learn. If we are unsure, we must experiment. When we make mistakes, we must admit them and know we have a right to be imperfect learners. And we can't be only for ourselves, because that keeps us small and turns us back to where we came from.
As we accept ourselves and come to know our imperfections and weaknesses, we can understand others better. We are stronger in giving to others and more effective because we have a place to stand.
Action for the Day: Today, even if I don't feel good about myself, I will stand up for my dignity as a person.
From: Bluidkiti's Alcohol and Drug Addictions Recovery Help/Support Forums Daily Recovery Readings - http://www.bluidkiti.com/forums/forumdisplay.php?f=2
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One Day At A Time
Prayer
Pray. Whether you believe it or not, pray to a higher power.
If we were able to stay sober on our own power, we wouldn't be here tonight.
It takes a power greater than ourselves, and prayer is how we contact that higher power.
You can use a religious one or one of your own choosing. If the God word bothers you,
pray to an anonymous higher power or even "to whom it may concern." In the morning,
ask this Higher Power to keep you sober that day and thank him at night for each sober day.
- The AA Grapevine, April 2013
Thought to Ponder
Trying to pray is praying.
AA-related 'Alconym'
P U S H = Pray Until Something Happens
From: AA Thought for the Day (courtesy AA-Alive.net)
Excerpt of The Daily Motivator
by Ralph Marston
There’s no need to get all stressed about the task. Just get it done.
There’s no reason to be overcome with worry about the problems. Just work on getting them solved.
You can achieve without making it an epic drama that burns you out. There’s no limit to what you can do with calm determination.
With calm determination, you even have some room for joy. Because you’re working at a sustainable pace, you’re able to keep at it for a long, productive time.
Neither tyranny nor victimhood will serve your life well. Refuse to picture yourself as being anywhere on that continuum.
Trade the stress, angst, and drama for something much more conducive to a satisfying, fulfilling life. Pursue your purpose with calm determination, and enjoy the journey every bit as much as the destination.
There’s no need to get all stressed about the task. Just get it done.
There’s no reason to be overcome with worry about the problems. Just work on getting them solved.
You can achieve without making it an epic drama that burns you out. There’s no limit to what you can do with calm determination.
With calm determination, you even have some room for joy. Because you’re working at a sustainable pace, you’re able to keep at it for a long, productive time.
Neither tyranny nor victimhood will serve your life well. Refuse to picture yourself as being anywhere on that continuum.
Trade the stress, angst, and drama for something much more conducive to a satisfying, fulfilling life. Pursue your purpose with calm determination, and enjoy the journey every bit as much as the destination.
From The Daily Motivator website at http://greatday.com/
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