Tuesday, August 7, 2012
Half of the troubles of this life can be traced to saying yes too quickly and not saying no soon enough. ~Josh Billings
For many of us, the most difficult word to say is one of the shortest and easiest in the vocabulary: No. Go ahead, say it aloud: No.
No - simple to pronounce, hard to say. We're afraid people won't like us, or we feel guilty. We may believe that a "good" employee, child, parent, spouse, or Christian never says no.
The problem is, if we don't learn to say no, we stop liking ourselves and the people we always try to please. We may even punish others out of resentment.
When do we say no? When no is what we really mean.
When we learn to say no, we stop lying. People can trust us, and we can trust ourselves. All sorts of good things happen when we start saying what we mean.
If we're scared to say no, we can buy some time. We can take a break, rehearse the word, and go back and say no. We don't have to offer long explanations for our decisions.
When we can say no, we can say yes to the good. Our no's and our yes's begin to be taken seriously. We gain control of ourselves. And we learn a secret: "No" isn't really that hard to say.
Today, I will say no if that is what I mean.
From The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie ©
True enjoyment comes from activity of the mind and exercise of the body.---Humboldt
Often, during our drinking and drugging, we ignored our mind and body. We probably ate poorly, and we pushed our body to the limit.
But now, we are to recover. . .totally! We are to care for our mind and body as we care for our spirit. Our illness is an illness of mind, body, and spirit. So let's care for all three. In recovery, we learn to care for and love all of who we are.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me care for my mind and body as I recover. You love all of me. Help me to respect and care for all of me.
Action for the Day: I will write down how much time I've spent caring for my mind and body in the past two weeks. Is it enough?
We have to stay sober no matter how life treats us,
no matter whether nonalcoholics or nonaddicts appreciate our sobriety or not.
We have to keep our sobriety independent of everything else,
not entangled with any people,
and not hedged in by any possible cop-outs or conditions.
- Living Sober, p. 64
Thought to Ponder . . .
I am worth staying sober for.
AA-related 'Alconym' . . .
H J F = Happy, Joyous, Free.
Embrace the responsibilities
It’s easy to be resentful about your responsibilities and commitments, and to see them as burdens. It’s much better to enthusiastically embrace the positive opportunities they offer.
Fighting against yourself, and your own obligations, is never in your best interest. Take the high road, gracefully accepting and fulfilling those obligations.
Every area of responsibility gives you the chance to make a positive difference in the world. Each obligation is an opportunity to add value to life.
Create that value, and put yourself at a significant advantage. Embrace the responsibilities, and feel the power that your responsible behavior brings you.
It’s true that not everyone is willing to move life forward. Yet those who actually do move life forward are the ones who benefit most from the resulting progress.
Choose to get the most out of life by consistently giving your best to life. Honor your commitments, meet your obligations, and truly enjoy the goodness that you are helping to sustain.
— Ralph Marston