Owning Our Power
We don't have to give others so much power and ourselves so little. We don't have to give others so much credit and ourselves so little. In recovery from codependency, we learn there's a big difference between humility and discounting ourselves.
When others act irresponsibly and attempt to blame their problems on us, we no longer feel guilty. We let them face their own consequences.
When others talk nonsense, we don't question our own thinking.
When others try to manipulate or exploit us, we know it's okay to feel anger and distrust and to say no to the plan.
When others tell us that we want something that we really don't want, or someone tells us that we don't want something that we really do want, we trust ourselves. When others tell us things we don't believe, we know it's okay to trust our instincts.
We can even change our mind later.
We don't have to give up our personal power to anyone: strangers, friends, spouses, children, authority figures, or those over whom we're in authority. People may have things to teach us. They may have more information than we have, and may appear more confident or forceful than we feel. But we are equals. Our magic is not in them. Our magic, our light, is in us. And it is as bright a light as theirs.
We are not second-class citizens. By owning our power, we don't have to become aggressive or controlling. We don't have to discount others. But we don't discount ourselves either.
Today, I will own my power with people. I will let myself know what I know, feel what I feel, believe what I believe, and see what I see. I will be open to changing and learning from others and experience, but I will trust and validate myself too. I will stand in my own truth.
From The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie ©
Keep It Simple
Happiness is not a goal; it is a by-product.---Eleanor Roosevelt
Most of us want to be happy. We just don't know how. We aren't sure what happiness is. We've learned the hard way that some things we wanted didn't make us happy. We're learning that happiness comes when we live the way our Higher Power wants us to live. That's when we’re honest. When we do our best work. When we are a true friend. We make happiness; we don't find it. Sometimes we don't even know we're happy. We're too busy with our work, our recovery program, our friends and family. We need to slow down and know that when we do what we need to, happiness comes.
Action for the Day: What parts of my program am I most happy about? Today I'll think of these and enjoy myself.
Continued to take personal inventory
and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.
- Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions, p. 88
Thought to Ponder . . .
It is the highest form of self-respect to admit mistakes
and to make amends for them.
AA-related 'Alconym' . . .
A A = Always Aware.
Your very essence
What you truly desire, you cannot ever take from anybody else. Because what you truly desire, is to fulfill your own unique purpose.
If you cheat or steal, you gain nothing of real value. If you destroy or injure, you are just making life more difficult for everyone, especially including you.
There are no shortcuts to the real fulfillment you seek. When you grab the mere tokens of that fulfillment, you push the real substance of it farther away.
There is no such thing as something for nothing. Even if there were, you would not want it, for it would bring no fulfillment.
Go ahead, make the commitment, make the effort, and persist in that effort until you can feel the fulfillment start to take hold. Go ahead and do the hard work to make a positive difference in your own special way, because that is what you long to do.
You are immensely valuable, and that value can be fully expressed only through sustained and focused effort. Make the commitment to live that value, for it is your very essence, and well worth whatever you must endure.— Ralph Marston