Manipulation is not foreign to most of us. We have probably manipulated and been manipulated. Manipulators may or may not be aware of what they're doing. There may be no malice involved. Often, the only intention is to find the means to continue an addictive behavior. Manipulation, however, can be terrifying if we're the end receiver. We may also deny that it's happening, usually because we're so confused by it all. But when we realize the truth, we're frightened not only by what's happened, but also by what could happen. We've fallen for this before, what's to prevent us from falling for it again?
We do our best to detach from the manipulator. This may mean letting go physically, emotionally, spiritually, and mentally. The more distance we have, the easier it is to see the truth, to recognize the manipulation. When we must have contact, we keep our head on straight. We don't need to answer to anyone right away. As time goes on, we're better able to identify and to deal appropriately with manipulative behavior.
Today I will have the courage to own the truth.
You are reading from the book:
Though it sounds like a game or a trick, there’s great power in “acting as if.” This means acting as if we’ve already succeeded, acting as if we expect everybody to cooperate with us, acting as if we’ve already reached whatever goal we’re seeking.
The principle behind this approach is that such acting helps focus our minds and energies on goals. It’s also important to believe that our success is inevitable if we are truly on the right path.
We should not employ this principle superstitously or assume it’s a substitute for intelligent work and good judgment. It will be a substantial aid, however, in helping us eliminate the self-doubt and pessimism that dog so many alcoholics during their quest for sobriety. Too often, low self-esteem and a faulty belief that nothing will turn out right have led us to sabotage our own efforts.
We should go into any venture with the idea that we’ve already succeeded…. that much good is going to come out of it, even if the exact outcome is somewhat different from what we had in mind. “Acting as if” is just what we might need to summon our powers for the duties ahead.
Action for the Day: I’ll carry on today with the confidence that my Higher Power is guidnig all my efforts in the right direction.
There is no more aloneness, with that awful ache,
so deep in the heart of every alcoholic that nothing, before, could ever reach it.
That ache is gone and never need return again.
Now there is a sense of belonging, of being wanted and needed and loved.
In return for a bottle and a hangover, we have been given the Keys of the Kingdom.
- Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 276
Thought to Ponder . . .
I'm not alone anymore.
AA-related 'Alconym' . . .
Y A N A = You Are Not Alon