Thou shalt not should thyself. —-Anonymous
When someone tells us we should do something, do we want to do it, or do we feel mad that someone else is telling us what we want to do? Sometimes we forget that these messages are not our own, but are the desires of others. It's important to listen to what we tell ourselves, to be aware of which messages we're giving ourselves and which come from others. We can make a list of all our shoulds and identify where they came from: parent, boss, friend, self. Then we can decide which shoulds are want to's, and throw out the rest. Doing what we want to is very different from doing what we should, and we can usually do a better job of it.
Have I freed myself of shoulds today?
From Today's Gift: Daily Meditations for Families ©
Twenty-Four Hours a Day
Releasing the Past
One thing we don't need in our lives is garbage from the past. Yet many of us say that old thoughts and bitter memories often sneak devilishly back to spoil what should have been a pleasant day. Why do we let garbage from the past befoul our lives a second time?
We seem to have built-in computers that work the same way. If we waste time and energy talking about past injustices or old mistakes, we are unwittingly calling them back into our lives. We are bringing back garbage that should have been discarded permanently to make room for better things.
Then the miracle happened -- to me!
It isn't always so sudden with everyone, but I ran into a personal crisis
that filled me with a raging and righteous anger.
As I fumed helplessly and planned to get good and drunk and show them,
my eye caught a sentence in the book lying open on my bed:
"We cannot live with anger." The walls crumpled -- and the light streamed in.
I wasn't trapped. I wasn't helpless.
I was free, and I didn't have to drink to "show them."
This wasn't "religion" -- this was freedom!
Freedom from anger and fear, freedom to know happiness,
and freedom to know love.
- Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 206
Thought to Ponder . . .
Anger rules nothing except itself.
AA-related 'Alconym' . . .
A A = Avoid Anger.