The only intrinsic evil is lack of love. —John Robinson
When we have feelings of guilt or self-hate, we have spiritual problems. It is a time to turn to our program for help. In the early stages of recovery we may, at times, feel more shameful than we ever did before, simply because we are becoming honest about how we feel. We may even become ashamed of our guilty feelings, and then the problem escalates.
Lack of love for ourselves is at the heart of our problem. We cannot become self-loving by force of will, but we can stop being so willful by simply yielding to the care of a loving God. At those moments we do not feel deserving of love, but we can stop fending it off. Perhaps God's love is coming to us in the concern of a friend or partner. Maybe it comes in the warm sunshine or in the smile of a child. As we yield to it, we take a spiritual leap into a world we don't control and we didn't create, but we can be healed by it.
Today, I will surrender to the love, which comes from the world around me and let it teach me how to love myself.
From Touchstones: A Book of Daily Meditations for Men ©
How can we express gratitude when we feel it? We can begin by simply using the proper forms of courtesy at all times; this reminds us that we can't live without other people. The best way to express gratitude, however, is to "ass on" the good that has come to us. This is more effective when we share ideas and experiences that have helped us on the way to self-improvement. It's also a good idea to dismiss thoughts and statements that are forms of prideful boasting. Even telling people how hard we've worked for the 12 Step program can detract from our gratitude. And never, under any circumstances, should we put others under obligation to us.
How painful it is to keep demanding the impossible,
and how very painful to discover, finally, that all along
we have had the cart before the horse!
Then comes the final agony of seeing how awfully wrong we have been.
- The Language of the Heart, p. 236
Thought to Ponder . . .
My sponsor gave me a "Humility" badge,
then took it away when I started wearing it.
AA-related 'Alconym' . . .
P R I D E = Pretty Ridiculous Individual Directing Everything