Having boundaries doesn't complicate life; boundaries simplify life.
There is a positive aspect to boundary setting. We learn to listen to ourselves and identify what hurt us and what we don't like. But we also learn to identify what feels good.
When we are willing to take some risks and begin actively doing so, we will enhance the quality of our life.
What do we like? What feels good? What brings us pleasure? Whose company do we enjoy? What helps us to feel good in the morning? What's a real treat in our life? What are the small, daily activities that make us feel nurtured and cared for?
What appeals to our emotional, spiritual, mental, and physical self? What actually feels good to us?
We have deprived ourselves too long. There is no need to do that anymore, no need. If it feels good, and the consequences are self-loving and not self-defeating, do it!
Today, I will do for myself those little things that make life more pleasurable. I will not deny myself healthy treats.
From The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie ©.
AA states that resentments is the "number one offender" among our members, that it puts more alcoholics in the graves than any other thing.---Stools and Bottles
We can get high on anger. That's why it's dangerous. We get a false sense of power from being angry. Our anger turns into resentments. Resentments turn into hate. Hate eats at our spiritual core.
We can get rid of resentments and hate through prayer and helping others. That's why we we're to pray for those who have wronged us, so our hearts don't fill with hate. This why, we use our energy in a healthy way. And our serenity will grow as we see that anger no longer has so much power over our actions.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me stop using anger, resentments and hate for control over other people and advents I don't like.
Action for the Day: I'll list all the people I'm angry at. I'll say a simple prayer for each of them.
how to stay sober.
And the sponsor has only one tool to use -- personal experience,
not scientific wisdom. Sponsors have been there,
and they often have more concern, hope, compassion, and confidence for us
than we have for ourselves.
- Living Sober, p. 27
Thought to Ponder . . .
Don't look for a sponsor, listen for one.
AA-related 'Alconym' . . .
S P O N S O R = Sober, Practical, Optimistic, Noble, Spiritual, Open-minded, Respectful.
A MEMBER SHARES:
My name is Vivien, and I'm an alcoholic. I have been blessed with the same sponsor since 1985, although I didn't stay sober until 1991. She never gave up on me. The first thing she said to me was that she would not ask me to do anything she had not done herself. I had a huge issue with trusting women. I could not trust myself, so how was I supposed to trust anyone else? "Men with the men, women with the women," she said. I just knew that she smelled a lot better and looked a lot better than I did. I had no clue what I was doing. She was the first woman I was able to trust in my sobriety. She nurtured me, and was strict when I needed it. She taught me the way living sober was supposed to be through the Steps. Then, she showed me how she did it. She also led me to other women in sobriety with a great foundation who spoke to me about the story of the Three Little Pigs. She then asked me what type of house I wanted to build on my AA foundation. I learned how to be a woman of honor and dignity, how to be a sister and a daughter -- things that booze took away from me. She also taught me about a Higher Power, and how important this was. I think the main thing that she taught me was that in order to keep what I had -- I had to share it with someone else. Today because of her, AA and my HP, I am almost 19 years sober. That is soooooooooooooo huge! I will be forever grateful. Thank you.
The path between wanting and having is doing. To stop just wanting, and begin having, then start doing.