Letting Things Happen
We do not have to work so hard at gaining our insights. Yes, we're learning that painful and disappointing things happen, often for a reason and a higher purpose. Yes, these things often work out for good. But we don't have to spend so much time and energy figuring out the purpose and plan for each detail of our life. That's hypervigilence!
Sometimes, the car doesn't start. Sometimes, the dishwasher breaks. Sometimes, we catch a cold. Sometimes, we run out of hot water. Sometimes, we have a bad day. While it helps to achieve acceptance and gratitude for these irritating annoyances, we don't have to process everything and figure out if it's in the scheme of things.
Solve the problem. Get the car repaired. Fix the dishwasher. Nurse yourself through the cold. Wait to take the shower until there's hot water. Nurture yourself through your bad day. Tend to your responsibilities, and don't take everything so personally!
If we need to recognize a particular insight or awareness, we will be guided in that direction. Certainly, we want to watch for patterns. But often, the big insights and the significant processing happen naturally.
We don't have to question every occurrence to see how it fits into the Plan. The Plan - the awareness, the insight, and the potential for personal growth - will reveal itself to us. Perhaps the lesson is to learn to solve our problems without always knowing their significance. Perhaps the lesson is to trust ourselves to live, and experience, life.
Today, I will let things happen without worrying about the significance of each event. I will trust that this will bring about my growth faster than running around with a microscope. I will trust my lessons to reveal themselves in their own time.
From The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie ©1990, Hazelden Foundation. All rights reserved.
No human creature can give order to love.George Sand
If we are trying to get others to love us, all we’re really doing is trying to be in control. Trying to control others can be a powerful drug. Remember, we can’t control others. We can’t make others love us. Our Higher Power has control, not us.
So, what do we need to do? Turn things over to our Higher Power and just be ourselves. Sure, it can scare us to just be ourselves. The truth is, not everyone will love us. But if we’re honest about who we are, others will respect us. We’ll like ourselves better. And we’ll have a better chance of loving others and being loved.
Prayer for the Day: I pray to have my need for control lifted from me. I pray to be rid of self-will.
Action for the Day: Today, I’ll list five ways my self-will---my need to control---has gotten me in trouble.
I began to feel like a clown juggling too many balls.
Each ball represented a problem I was keeping up in the air.
My arms were weary and I knew I couldn't keep on much longer,
but I was not about to give up. My pride and ego wouldn't let me.
Bosses, judges, co-workers, lawyers, car notes, bar tabs, loan sharks,
utility payments, landlords, my girlfriend, people I had double-crossed --
I looked to all these as the source of my problems,
while overlooking the most basic problem: my drinking and myself . . .
I desperately wanted off this merry-go-round, but I had no idea how to do it.
- Alcoholics Anonymous. p. 506
Thought to ponder . . .
The solution is simple. The solution is spiritual.
AA-related 'Alconym' . . .
H O W = Honesty, Open-mindedness, Willingness.