Edith Bunker: I was just thinking. In all the years we been married, you never once said you was sorry.
Archie Bunker: Edith, I'll gladly say that I'm sorry - if I ever do anything wrong.
We can laugh at Archie because we see a part of ourselves in him. We have lived in a cloud of denial, blind to our faults. If we weren't actually blind to them, perhaps we just refused to admit them because we did not dare. Changing this pattern takes time and determination. We make progress in recovery when we stop focusing on what is wrong with others and start being accountable for ourselves. We grow when we are willing to amend our lives and accept forgiveness for our mistakes.
A feeling of self-respect flows into us when we stand up and say "I did something wrong." This statement also says, "I have the strength to face my responsibilities and repair my mistakes." It is surprisingly helpful to our self-esteem, and it improves our relationships.
Today, I will be accountable for my actions and will admit my mistakes.
From Touchstones: A Book of Daily Meditations for Men ©
The way to love anything is to realize it might be lost. ---G.K. Chesterton
Every day we take so much for granted. But we can count certain blessings: a roof over our head, food, clothing, family, and friends, freedom, a Higher Power we trust. These things are special. Thinking about them wakes up our happiness. Our recovery program shows us how happy. we just have to remember to do what it tells us!
He finds himself in possession of a degree of honesty, tolerance, unselfishness,
peace of mind, and love, of which he had thought himself quite incapable.
What he has received is a free gift, and yet usually, at least in some small part,
he has made himself ready to receive it.
- Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions, p. 107
Thought to Ponder . . .
I asked from the heart, and I received.
AA-related 'Alconym' . . .
H O W = Honesty, Open-mindedness, Willingness.
A MEMBER SHARES:
I'm John, an alcoholic, and I'm willing to go to any lengths so I don't have to run away today with booze. Receptiveness is my willingness to allow my Higher Power to be my Higher Power, and be happy that today I only need to be John. Willingness to do the needed Twelve-Step work so that I am not the man I was when I walked into AA. Receptiveness for me is praying for God's grace finally getting through this thick skull and once-closed heart to allow me to live a sober life today. Without receptiveness, I again build that wall around me to keep you out. You know that wall -- the one which imprisoned me with my fears, resentments, and booze for years. I'm open to the idea that I need to kneel each day so that I can stand sober today. Willingness to remember that each time I can do something for someone else, I am doing something for me. I am getting out of my own head, helping another person, and changing from the way I used to be when drunk. Receptive to the idea that humility may mean not thinking less of myself, but thinking about myself less often. Without receptiveness, my eyes, ears, and heart are closed to messages which could save my life today. I thank God I have been given this gift so that I can live rather than exist miserably and drunk as I did for many years. Thank you for letting me share.
What do you really need? What if some of the things you think you need, you do not need at all?